tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23572882.post3906847967435997732..comments2023-10-09T04:17:01.614-07:00Comments on Writing in Practice: Demo: Pacing and Emotional TemperatureAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12850856107580360138noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23572882.post-19582532744254034272011-07-24T13:42:16.641-07:002011-07-24T13:42:16.641-07:00I think the second passage works much better. I fe...I think the second passage works much better. I felt more involved, and the passage just seemed to draw me in. <br /><br />The first passage is "nicer" and gives a more objective POV. Yet, I feel that it does not have the same measure of urgency and breathlessness. <br /><br />So, like you said, the first passage merely states the situation, while the second passage makes us "feel" it.Sharadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05969496743276082330noreply@blogger.com